Irelande Douze Points!

Dustin the Turkey (RTÉ)

You can watch Ireland's entry for this year's Eurovision Song Contest online thanks to RTÉ and YouTube. No really, thank you. And here are the profound lyrics:

Oh, I come from a nation
What knows how to write a song
Oh Europe, where oh where did it all go wrong?

Come on!!!!!!

Irlande douze points

Drag acts and bad acts and Terry Wogan's wig
Mad acts and sad acts, it was Johnny Logan's gig

Shake your feathers and pop your beak
Shake 'em to the west and to the east
Wave Euro hands and Euro feet
Wiggle to the edge of the turkey beat

Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Do the funky beat

D O E double B L E yeah

Hello Abba, hello Bono, hello Helsinki
Ola Prague, hello sailor, c'est la vie
Auf wiedersehen Mama Mia, and god save the Queen
Bonjour Serbia, good day Austria
You know what I mean?

Shake your feathers and pop your beak
Shake 'em to the west and to the east
Wave Euro hands and Euro feet
Wiggle to the edge of the turkey beat

Shake your feathers and pop your beak
Shake 'em to the west and to the east
Wave Euro hands and Euro feet
Wiggle to the edge of the turkey beat

Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
(and fart!)
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Do the funky beat
Come on!!

Give us another chance, we're sorry for Riverdance
Sure Flately he's a yank
And the Danube flows through France
Block voting, shock voting
Give your 12 today
You're all invited to Dublin, Ireland
And we'll party the Shamrock way

Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points
Do the funky beat
Come on!!

Irlande douze points
Irlande douze points

Eastern Europe we love you
Do you like Irish stew?
Or goulash as it is to you?

Shake your feathers

Listen Bulgaria, we love you
Belarus, Georgia, Montenegro,
Moldavia, Albania, Croatia,
Poland, Russia, Ukraine,
Macedonia, love you Turkey
Hungary, Estonia, Slovakia,
Armenia, Bosnia Herzegovina
And don't forget the Swiss!"

Stop Blair!

Stop Blair! Stoppt Blair! Stoppons Blair! Paremos a Blair! Powstrzymaj Blaira! Σταματήστε τον Μπλαιρ! Állítsuk meg Blairt! Há que parar Blair! Stoppa Blair! Stopnite Blaira! Stabdom Blair'ą! Cuir stad air Blair!

We, European citizens of all origins and of all political persuasions, wish to express our total opposition to the nomination of Tony Blair to the Presidency of the European Council..."

Full petition wording (via European Tribune)

Direct to sign the petition